The Holiday Party

admin December 04, 2008 Uncategorized 10 Comments

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We’ve discussed elsewhere the torment of team building exercises and the wretchedness of retreats, but not yet the horrors of The Holiday Party. My staff seem to want to have one, and the general climate here suggests that I can’t do as I’ve done in the past: host it in a bar where I made up for the lack of holiday spirit (because I hate holiday spirit) by giving people Real Spirits. Mmmmm spirits.

Here, I think it will be more traditional, except I’m being cantakerous and have asked the Party Planning Committee (yes, it is like “The Office”) to keep the “holiday” part pretty generic. So it will be the worst of all worlds: no real spirits and no holiday spirits! Mmmmm good times.

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10 Responses to “The Holiday Party”

  1. Kyle said:

    Dec 04, 08 at 7:00 pm

    Last year I had been “the man” for a month when the dreaded holiday party reared it’s head. So I took everyone to lunch. They all sat at one big table separated into their little cliques and talked to the same people they talk to all the time. So this year I wasn’t planning on doing one, but so many people asked about it that we’re doing it again. Same place, and I anticipate the same result.

    Maybe I’ll make everyone sit next to someone from a different department and of a different gender this time…

  2. Seth Vidal said:

    Dec 04, 08 at 8:21 pm

    holiday parties are a special kind of hell. Even worse yet if they are ‘mandatory’ which is when I like to claim to be a jehovah’s witness or something equally difficult to get along with like *gasp* an atheist. 🙂

  3. Maurry said:

    Dec 05, 08 at 6:30 am

    What’s wrong with you Scrooge’s? Have you never been an employee? We, employees, love Holiday Parties… yes, even if we sit with the same people year after year and eat the same food. We feel cheated if other departments have parties and we don’t. The only requirement is that the party be held during working hours, preferably at lunch and then everyone goes home afterwards. So, essentially, no one does any work the entire day as the morning is spent anticipating the party. By now, you have probably realized that I’m the guy that does something every year at the Holiday Party which causes tongues to wag for several days after. And yet, I have been adroit enough to keep my job (and my marriage) throughout my shenanigans. Moreover, our holiday party has never been at a bar….what a great idea and what great opportunities for me to finally go too far.

  4. Bendy said:

    Dec 05, 08 at 10:25 am

    helpful hint: tell yourself that your endurance of said events is your “Feat of Strength”

  5. admin said:

    Dec 05, 08 at 5:37 pm

    Perhaps the problem with all of our holiday parties is that Maurry wasn’t there? Knowing him, I believe this isn’t as far fetched as it sounds. Dad, perhaps if you ever retire from your day job, you could work as the “fun-loving life of the party guy”?

    However, to give credit to some of us: Seth and I both would get invited to the same holiday party year after year which broke one of Dad’s requirements: it was held OUTSIDE OF WORKING HOURS! Yes, that’s right, you needed to stay late to attend…

  6. essprit said:

    Dec 05, 08 at 6:28 pm

    I’m sad because I proposed a non-specific festive celebratory event to coincide with the end of a very busy semester, to be held during business hours, to be paid for by the office, to include the option of alcoholic beverages (beer, at least) and to be something people have actually said repeatedly that they enjoy (bowling). With three exceptions, everyone said they were too busy to attend. The exceptions happened to be the three people who actually *are* the busiest of everyone involved.

    I think I might just invite those three people out for drinks and then get them snockered enough that they won’t go home and do more work later – they could use the break.

  7. admin said:

    Dec 09, 08 at 8:16 pm

    Essprit, now you’re on the right track! But get a designated driver 🙂

  8. Mom said:

    Dec 11, 08 at 9:34 am

    We just received a letter from a local real estate company saying that instead of giving their annual holiday party, which we loved – free food and drinks and friends, they were making a donation to the local food pantry, suggesting that we do the same. I’m not even ashamed to be disappointed with a twinge of mean spiritedness. What do you all think?

  9. admin said:

    Dec 11, 08 at 7:11 pm

    They did that at a friend’s workplace, and–sorry, Mom–we both said how great that was. Consider this: work parties are not actual parties: you’re not with your real friends, nor are you relaxing away from work. I suspect you liked the real estate party because you were a guest rather than a worker and didn’t feel the need to show up the next morning all bright-eyed and raring to go. Why don’t you announce that instead of your annual donation to The Heifer Fund or wherever, you’re going to get a keg and BBQ some beef and invite the realtors in? 🙂

  10. Mom said:

    Dec 12, 08 at 4:59 am

    You are right on all counts. In fact, Heifer – BBQ – I get it. You must come from a wonderful family.

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